17 Jokes For Undertaker

Puns

Updated on: May 01 2025

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What did the undertaker say to the procrastinator? 'Stop delaying, and let's bury the hatchet!
Did you hear about the undertaker who opened a seafood restaurant? It's called 'Rest in Mollusk'!
What's the undertaker's favorite ice cream flavor? Grave-illa!
Why did the undertaker start a bakery? Because he wanted to make coffin pastries!
What's the undertaker's favorite type of music? Decom-pose!
What's the undertaker's favorite game? Graveyard Twister!
What did the undertaker say to the lazy employee? 'You're not putting in enough coffin-t!

The Undertaker's GPS

Did you know the Undertaker uses GPS? Yeah, it's a bit different though. Instead of saying Turn left, it just ominously says, When you reach the end of the road, your destination will be on the right... or should I say, the afterlife.

Undertaker's Gym Routine

I heard the Undertaker has a unique gym routine. He doesn't do cardio; he does corpse-o. It's all about that graveyard fitness, lifting tombstones and digging graves. No wonder he's in killer shape!

Dating Advice from the Undertaker

I asked the Undertaker for dating advice. He said, If you really want to impress someone, take them to a cemetery at midnight. I tried it, and now I have a restraining order. Turns out, people prefer coffee shops.

The Undertaker's Retirement Party

You know, I heard the Undertaker recently threw a retirement party. Yeah, the theme was 'Rest in Peace,' which is fitting because after a career of tombstones and choke slams, now he just wants a good night's sleep.

The Undertaker's Stand-up Comedy Career

Imagine the Undertaker doing stand-up comedy. His opening line would be, I've buried more people than I've made laugh. Talk about a tough crowd. You'd be dying for the punchline.

Undertaker's Tinder Profile

I found the Undertaker on Tinder. His profile says, I'm looking for a long-term commitment. Must love dark alleys, coffins, and have a strong aversion to garlic.

Undertaker's Day Job

Ever wonder what the Undertaker's day job is? He works at a bakery. Yeah, he specializes in coffin-shaped cookies. It's the only place where business is literally dead.

Undertaker's Retirement Plan

The Undertaker's retirement plan? It's simple. He's investing in real estate – six feet of it. He figures the property value only goes up, and there's no need to worry about noisy neighbors.

Job Security in the Afterlife

I was thinking about becoming an undertaker myself. I mean, talk about job security! People are dying to get in, and once they do, they're not going anywhere. It's recession-proof, depression-proof, and even zombie apocalypse-proof!

Undertaker's Cookbook

I found the Undertaker's cookbook the other day. It's called Graveyard Grub. The recipes are to die for, literally. The secret ingredient is always six feet under, and every dish comes with a side of eternal rest.

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