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You know, skeletons love taking selfies too. I saw one skeleton trying to take a selfie, but he couldn't get the angle right. I said, "Dude, you need to loosen up a bit. Oh wait, you're all loose already!" It's like, how do you strike a pose when you don't have muscles to flex? He ended up looking like a Halloween decoration trying to be an Instagram model. And don't get me started on the Instagram captions. "Just hanging out with my bone-afide friends." I mean, really? They've got the skeleton of a sense of humor.
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So, I'm at this skeleton bar, right? And I notice these skeletons trying to hit on each other. It's like a scene from a romantic horror movie. One skeleton goes up to another and says, "Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you're Cu-Te." I thought, "Wow, even in the afterlife, they're using cheesy pick-up lines." But it gets weirder. Another skeleton tries a different approach, saying, "Are you a fossil sample? Because I want to date you." I mean, talk about bone-chilling romance! I turned to my friend and said, "If these skeletons had hearts, they'd probably be breaking them right now.
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Ladies and gentlemen, have you ever been to a skeleton bar? Yeah, you know, the kind where even the drinks have no body! I walked into this joint, and I swear, the bartender had the driest sense of humor. I asked him for a cocktail, and he hands me a glass of calcium supplements! I mean, really? I wanted a drink, not a boost to my bone density! And the customers there, they're something else. I tried to start a conversation with this guy at the bar, but he was so thin-skinned, literally! I complimented his outfit, and he said, "Oh, it's just something I picked up in the closet." I said, "Yeah, but isn't that where you live?" Awkward silence, folks, awkward silence. I guess skeletons aren't known for their wit.
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I went up to the skeleton bartender and asked, "What's your signature drink?" He looked at me with those empty eye sockets and said, "The Bone Dry Martini." I thought it was a joke, so I laughed, and he replied, "No, seriously, it's just a glass of air." Now, that's a drink I can't wrap my head around! And then he hands me the bill. I'm thinking, "Great, I just paid for nothing." I asked him if there's a discount for being alive, and he said, "Sorry, no discounts. We're all equal in death." Well, I guess equality has its price, and in this case, it's a bit steep.
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