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Sick Irish people have a secret weapon – the healing power of Irish music. You haven't truly recovered until you've belted out a ballad or two. Forget cough syrup; give me a fiddle and a tin whistle.
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Being sick and Irish is a unique experience. Other people take medicine, but the Irish? We just rely on the healing power of a good cup of tea. You could have a broken leg, and your Irish mom would still say, "Ah, sure, have a cuppa, you'll be grand.
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Being sick and Irish is like a national pastime. We don't just have regular sneezes; we have Riverdance sneezes. It's all about adding a bit of flair, even when you're under the weather.
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Irish flu remedy: A shot of whiskey, a slice of soda bread, and a nap under a four-leaf clover. Works every time. The whiskey might not cure you, but you won't care about being sick anymore.
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You ever notice how Irish people get sick? It's like, instead of a thermometer, they use a shamrock. "Oh, love, I'm feeling a bit under the weather. Pass me that lucky charm and let's check my temperature.
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You ever hear about the Irish guy who tried to call in sick to work? His boss said, "Sure, take a sick day, but only if you can prove your illness with a note from your local pub. And make it stamped by the bartender.
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When Irish people are sick, we don't call it a fever; we call it a "potato boil." "Oh, I've got a fierce potato boil, I do. Need some chicken soup and a side of mashed potatoes to cure it.
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I was so sick last week; I thought I might have caught a leprechaun flu. Instead of coughing, I was just spouting Irish proverbs uncontrollably. "May the road rise to meet you... and please pass the tissues.
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You know you're sick and Irish when your doctor prescribes you a pint of Guinness and a bowl of Irish stew. "Take this twice a day, and you'll be dancing a jig in no time. Sláinte!
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